another letter.. for the sake of writing, i guess? haha!

hi buggy-bun!!! *smiles and waves* can i ask you a favor? *smiles*
can you tell all these people stuff for me? :D please. you get a personalized letter naman eh! hahaha! as if that does any good.. but yeah.. haha.. you know i love you and i trust you and i'm asking you this cuz i'm positive you could get this done.. hehe.. *smiles very big*

tell lola not to be afraid of the dark. and to stop cooking weird things every now and then for mara and rolo's sake. there isn't any food in the house sometimes cuz all the kitchen cooks are her unknown dishes. tell her that her sane dishes are the ones that are really good. and tell her not to stop baking fruit cake. and that i'll yell at lolo for her once i see him. tell her i'm sorry for not being such a good roomate and for falling short of being a good grandchild.

tell mom... hmmm.. what would i tell mom? haha! tell mom that... G and A can take care of themselves, mara and rolo can't. tell her rolo needs to be treated like a boy not a baby. tell her that dad's trying real hard. and that he needs her. tell her that things will get better and that yelling isn't always the answer. tell her to listen to mara. she has a lot to say too. tell her that throughout everything i still love her.

tell dad to stop drinking coke light. his stomach will just get bigger. tell him that i love him very much. and i promise he'll get his farm and his british SUV one day. tell him i'm sorry i wasn't able to help out. that's what i wanted to do. that's ALL i wanted to do. help out. and tell him i'm sorry i didn't get to. get the money from my wallet (it's in my drawer) and go to hongkong and eat there. tell him thanks for all the times he took me out, just the two of us to all those restaurants. i'm sorry
that i owe him and i wasn't able to do anything to pay him back. love daddy.

tell rolo that my charizard is still way better than all of his pokemon. tell him to watch naruto, too.. and gatekeepers. im sure he'll love both. tell him that he's smart and that he shouldn't waste it. make gago mara for me, cuz i know he can. tell him to try out for debate once he gets into highschool, it'll help him a lot. tell him to try to play a sport cuz that'll help him a lot too.
tell him to keep smiling cuz he has the gift of making everyone happy. tell him to stop dancing ballet cuz he'll just get teased in school. tell him i'm sorry if i keep picking on him and pinning him down and tickling him and making fun of his ears and teeth but that only means i love him so so much.

tell mara not to be emo. tell her that everything's going to turn out for the better, whatever happens. tell her not to stop dancing cuz that's what she's really good at. make sure she tries out. cuz i know she wants it. tell her that boys aren't everything. tell her that she could get silver if she only tried harder and focused on what she was doing. tell her to pay attention in class. and tell her to stop procrastinating. tell her i love her, even if i've never said it to her. even if she has been an evil little sister who used to bite me and pull my hair.

on to friends.. hehe..

to mole: tell her i love her. tell her to relax. and tell her i'm sorry. blue's going to do well under her, i'm sure. tell her that she's done so much for me. she made me realize a lot. and that things turn up good. always. i can prove it to her. *hugg*tell her that she can talk to me if she wants.. i'll be listening to her all the time. i'll be watching her.. bwahaha! :D

to chesca: tell her that boys aren't everything. partying isn't everything. but tell her i'm proud of her that she's doing real well in school. tell her she'll get into ateneo and stop worrying. and that she's really funny. and to be careful cuz there'll be a whole lot other freaky people out there too. take care.
to dc: tell her that i'm proud of her. that she'll make it in comm. tell her to keep acting and to keep singing. and keep doing what she's doing cuz she's doing real well. tell her to study, she can get gold. she's a math genius. tell her to keep smiling and to relax. her perfect dude'll come too. don't worry.

to tracy: tell her she really does belong in africa. if not, afghanistan. tell her that she'll always be my first friend (ever since rosemont) and that the power rangers rule. thank her for me. tell her i'm proud of her. and good luck with puso. she's doing well.

to karla: i'm proud of her. she's become so so so responsible with her softball team. she's doing great as captain. tell her thanks for all the laughy laughy times and all the kwentos and for being a hell of a friend. for all the times we "hung" at her place.. haha! oh.. and ask my sister to give her the notebook. it's yellow and it's on the desk next to my mirror in my room. tell her not to worry and to keep smiling.

to paula: tell her i know she and squishy aren't together cuz she gives him gifts and he gives her gifts and they go out a whole lot. and that he'll punch some dude for liking her. hahaha! tell her to take care. take things easy. tell her i'm proud of
her, she's doing so well... in everything. tell her not to make fun of you guys too much. oh.. and make fun of her for me once in awhile. haha!

to jo: tell her THANK YOU SO MUCH. tell her i love her! and give her a hugg for me. tell her that i'm glad that we got to bond semi a lot this year. it's nice to just get to talk and let out sometimes. especially since she's a great listener. tell her not to fight with her puppy too much. tell her to take care of herself. i know she can but just be careful. MANY MANY people love her very much.

to monica: tell her to believe in herself. she's an amazing leader and she can pull gold off. tell her that the first thing she has to do is to calm down. and then think. she can do this. i know her. tell her i'm sorry i won't be her 911 girl anymore but tell her i love her for being my labour girl. if she ever needs to talk, i'll always be there to listen. ooo, i'll be watching her too. tell her to be good! books before boys. be good! and monica paraso sounds better than the other one. haha!

to tina: tell her i love her very much. though we weren't classmates for the longest time neither are we in the same barkada anymore, it feels like we never really drifted too far. at least not far enough that we can't still talk and rant. thank her for me. for listening to me. and for editing my canto. tell her that i know she'll do well in creative writing. tell her good luck and to take care of herself. hug her for me and tell her not to eat too much sweets.

to farida: tell her to be GOOD. stop it na. to carissa: tell her jack's mannequin is the bestest, so is something corporate.. basta.. andrew macmahon. pinch katrina real hard for me and tell her i know she's a big softy inside. tell her not to feel bad that she can't make fun of me cuz i know she'll miss me for that.. hahaha!

to navey: crack nav's knuckle for me, would you? and tell her that things left is the direction to where her hand that doesn't write is at and right is the one that does right. they're homonyms so tell her to remember. tell her she's magnificent and totally kind. i can't comprehend how she is just so.. open to everyone, so kind and so patient. tell her though, that once she gets to college, she has to be careful and take care of herself. everyone loves her. tell her not to worry and to take things slowly. tell her i love her.

to lovey: hug her at the waist for me. thank her for making things uber light. tell her i'll miss her and her ditz sidekicks(eluel and leco). tell her that she will find her hott foreign rich dude eventually and that she's going to be real successful and happy. tell her not to shop too too much cuz the stores will run out of supply for her demand. take it slow. tell her that she's really lucky and that i love her very much. and that i'm grateful for getting close to her cuz it's cuz of her that i laugh and smile and get to move on. she's amazing. tell her i'm sorry for all the times i got her pissed and all the times i got pissed at her. but let her know how much i love her, ok?

Frasquita,

i owe you this. really. i do.

have i ever told you how much i love you? i guess not cuz it's so easy to just say "i love you", i mean.. i could just say i love you to anyone and i could just say it to you and you can't really tell the difference, now can you? i guess you already know though. well, at least have an idea. you know everything bout me. scary. but true. but.. i hope at least i've shown you how much i do. and i hope you got the idea, somewhat.

i'm going to miss you, pilfer. all the emailing (which we don't do anymore), all the texting (oh, we still do that.. ), all the phone calls (talking about nonsense sometimes, or you practicing for your big break as a cartoon background sound maker, or talking about problems and... me talking about how i feel), all the chats (... yeah...) , all the hanging out and all the stuff that you've gotten me into (the things you make me read and the things you make me watch, haha!).

i'm sorry, oyabun. i'm sorry for always bombarding you with my depressing thoughts, i know it gets you down sometimes, many times actually and i'm sorry. i'm sorry for not being able to be there for you all the time, for not being able to make you feel better all the time and to cheer you up when you need it. i'm sorry for being so ignorant, not knowing when you're feeling bad and when you're ok, for not being able to read you the way you read me. i try.. hard. but sometimes it's not enough. i'm sorry if my criticism doesn't help you sometimes. i'm sorry i forget that it's your bedtime at 10:30 sometimes. i'm sorry that i keep teasing your grade 3 love. or.. not love, rather. and to trouble-magnet, sweet writer, stupid, smart, 3 and small-ey. i'm sorry for being so strubborn. and so impulsive. i know you hate it and i'm sorry i wasn't able to change fast enough. i'm sorry that i can't ever be good and i can't ever rely on myself. i'm sorry i bore you sometimes. i'm sorry that you have to take care of me all the time. i'm sorry i'm so emotional. and i say sorry and thank you a billion times. i'm sorry that i've pissed you off so many more times these past 6 months than all the time we've known each other. i'm sorry i'm so kulit telling you to drink your medicine and rest and all that when you're sick. and when you're still up at 10:31. i'm sorry i'm so KSP and so conceited. i'm sorry for making promises and breaking them, really.. i can never forgive myself for doing that. i don't know why you put up with me, i seriously don't know why you do.

thank you, shdowmus. for being there when my life changed drastically and i needed someone to turn to. for reprimanding me. for being good and making me want to change and be good. for being with me when i'm down. for listening to me when no one would. for being trustworthy. for cheering me up. for being able to read me as well as you can. for knowing every single bit about me and still not leaving me alone. for being so patient in letting me vent out everything. and in teaching me stuff for school. for making things light. for always being there and being ready to listen to me. for hugging me back when i need a hug. for consoling me. for confiding and trusting me (you do, right? haha!). thank you for sharing yourself. for calming me down all the time (i know i needed a lot of that). for giving me hope, reminding me that things'll be ok. for forgiving me every single time. for being so selfless. for introducing arima and all the others.. hehe.. and thank you so much for making me feel like i mattered.

i know you've prolly heard most of these thank you's and sorry's but hey.. this is the last time you'll ever have to hear it,
right? haha..

i'm proud of you, phil. you've done so much already. i'm proud of the yearbook. i'm proud of all the gold certificates you've gotten. all the people you've tutored. all the plaid files you've made. all the green and yellow stickers you've made. all the sermons you've given and i'm proud of who you are and of you being so good. i'm proud to say that i knew you. i can't say i contributed to any of that or any of who you are now. but i'm proud to be able to see you change and to see that you really are amazing. don't ever lose confidence in yourself. believe you can do it. cuz i know you can. i've seen you work and i promise you can. all you need to do is want it. you'll get it, i promise. the fact that people know you can do it must mean you can, right? don't be afraid of disappointing others cuz they already are very proud of you. it's ok to fail. it's ok to get lost. it's ok to make mistakes. otherwise, how else will we know what to improve on, right? everything happens for a reason, right? right.
so yeah..

bye buggy.
i love you.
no regrets. :D
p.s. it's ok to be emotional sometimes.. :D *gives mr. frog the tightest hug ever*